hope

Some folks who already know me know about my current situation. In case you have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm a part-time web developer. I don't make a lot of money. Really, my main focus is bringing in just a little bit of extra money so that I can manage my household. When you have a blended family that includes 4 crazy kids and a puppy, it's really nice to be able to be home so that I can control the chaos a little bit.

Thing is, my husband, a graphic artist/web guru/etc. was laid off from his job. We found out in November, and his last day was December 3rd. Yes. Right before Christmas. I know, right? It's a little hard to be happy when you find out that your main source of income is just POOF. Gone.

Well, it's hard to be happy until you have friends and family who come out of the woodwork to help you. Countless folks sent us gifts for the entire family. Gift cards, gently used toys, play dresses, board games. It was overwhelming... in a happy way. I was so grateful. So humbled. So happy.

But now that the holidays are over, the looming freakout is back to some degree. Hubby was given a severence of 6 weeks. I've had a couple of decent web development months, which really have helped. Hubby was granted unemployment (THANK DUDE his previous employer didn't fight him on it!) But when the severence money is gone, it's GONE. Ugh. Cue that sick feeling in your stomach.

I haven't checked out bank account in at least two weeks. I couldn't bare to do it. But, this morning, we had more in there than I thought we would. I did my invoicing for the month, and we had a solid $500 more than I thought we would. Kansas just graced us with a check for unemployment. So while we're still really hustling to find ways to get by, I can relax a little. There's hope in that, ya know?

We're still waiting to here from "the bank" about a potential job opening. Hubby interviewed, and it went really well. They've been putting off the decision FOREVER. No, really... since the beginning of December. Cripes, people. The HR lady has assured Hubby that he's still absolutely in the running, so we're trying to be hopeful. But, it's hard. It's all just hard.

So, today, I will find happy in some meditation. And this evening, I will find even more happy when I take the time to color my hair. (Oh MAN... the roots are ridiculous!) And for dinner, I will find happy in making my family Hamburger Helper and NOT spending hours and hours in the kitchen. (Don't judge. We all have meals of shame now and again.)

Where are you finding your happy these days? Organization? Taking pictures? Cooking? Crafting? Something else? I really do want to know.